Struck by Ashleys words Yulya stumbles and sinks down next to Ashley as if weighted down by a huge rock
Thank you for telling me Ashley! I guess on top of being a terrible party leader and peace cleric I am also not a very good friend either.
Despite my looks I am not human I do not understand human feelings and desires I never did. Thats why I became a hermit I never wanted to be an adventurer or party leader none of this. I hate ordering people around an I am also very bad at it. But this is the mission bestowed upon my by god and I will follow it to the bitter end. Even if I do not even know what this mission is and even if the gods themselves may hate me. None of this matters for I am just a tool. I guess you could say that is extreme or even insane and I do not expect others to understand. But I feel this is the best thing I can do to protect those important to me. Including you.
Yulya laughs bitterly Just listen to me thats what I like to say but in truth all I want to do is run away from everything and hide in my cabin. If I could, if I were strong enough thats what I would do but as things are that would mean certain death out there. For all of us. Our only chance to survive is to stick together here at the guild and try to become stronger. None of us can survive on her own ok maybe Cat could with her survival skills but the rest would just die in no time. And despite all our differences I think we make a great party. I love our party and I would not want to be lumped together with anyone else. I am not good with people especially strangers but you are all my friends and family even if I do not much about you I feel safe around you. It is where I belong. And what I want to protect.
So Ashley I am sorry for hurting your feelings as I said I am not good with this both Alice and Cat are very straightforward with what they like and dislike. Maybe thats why we dont have problems. So please from now on tell me if there is something that bothers you. I will always listen and try my best to resolve the situation.
Yes the battle against the rothé did not go as planned at all in fact it was a disaster and this is my responsibility. I would have preferred to stay on the cart but this was not an option as it charged away and toward civilians. Your summons would not have reached it from this distance. I also apologize for casting Emboldening Bond on you and Cat without warning. To be honest I misjudged its range it was the first time I used it in a real world situation ever. But to be fair I always kept you out of the rothés range while throwing myself into great danger. In the end I could not deal any damage at all only your summons and Cat did. Frankly I am glad in a way. I do not want to hurt creatures either I may not be a pacifist but witnessing pain and suffering in others hits me deeply. I do not want to destroy. I want to create aide and heal. But you know this world isnt about what we want but about what we must do to protect ourselves and the ones we love. And this is what I will do. At any cost.
