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Welcome to the EXTREME AUTISM limbo fun zone.

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How to Fuck Felix Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 10:04:41 [Preview] No. 31478
Right, we need to make Felix real. This thread is for discussing possible pathways to his ass.

0) Imaginary friend

Wank to your imagination, have dinner with your daki.

Realism: initally trash, but sustaining this for long enough may provide a substantial boost from mental illness

Possibility: defiantly possible

Timeline: partially right now + 1-2 weeks for the daki to ship

Cost: <$100 initally

1) Cosplay thot

Hire a whore to wear a costume.

Realism: 3DPD

Possibility: defiantly possible

Timeline: 1-2 weeks

Cost: <$300

2) Sex robot

Think realdoll, but robotic. This doesn't require any real progress in AI.

Realism: not much, but fun to fuck anyway

Possibility: defiantly possible

Timeline: 1-2 decades

Cost: $10-20k

3) AI Waifu

Sex robot, but with real AI.

Realism: excellent

Possibility: definatly possible

Timeline: 3-6 decades at the least

Cost: $10-20k+software licence

4) Brainstem implant blocking/providing sensory signals, a la the matrix.

>Leia, from Dagenham in east London, had no inner ear or hearing nerve, meaning that even standard hearing aids or cochlear implants wouldn't help her.

>[She was] one of the first children in the UK to be given an auditory brainstem implant, requiring complex brain surgery

>Now, after lots of regular speech and language therapy, she can put full sentences together, attempt to sing along to music and hear voices on the phone.

>The cutting-edge surgery involves inserting a device directly into the brain to stimulate the hearing pathways in children born with no cochlea or auditory nerves.

>A microphone and sound processor unit worn on the side of the head then transmits sound to the implant.

>This electrical stimulation can provide auditory sensations, but it cannot promise to restore normal hearing.

https://soylentnews.org/article.pl?sid=19/04/21/177238

There are similar, but currently low quality, implants for the optic nerve which provide visual qualia.

Realism: potentially indistinguishable from reality

Possibility: defiantly possible

Timeline: >3 decades

Cost: cheap once the implant is bought

5) Whole brain emulation + simulated felix

Wait to die, scan brain, simulate brain. The simulation picks up where you left off so it appears as seamless as general anesthesia.

Realism: potentially indistinguishable from reality

Possibility: defiantly possible for a functionalist, others won't find it acceptable; current preservation methods are probably insufficient but will advance

Timeline: can sign up now, will take a while before scanning, current preservation may not be sufficient though since we haven't fully identified what we need to preserve (e.g.: phosphorylation must be preserved, but there's a bunch we're unsure about)

Cost: $80-100k+$10k if outside USA/Canada unless China in which case +$50k

7) Genetically engineered catfags for domestic ownership

Genetically engineering loving catboys who voluntarily serve the master they imprint on to dodge the slavery issue.

Realism: real

Possibility: defiantly possible, but society will reject it for ages

Timeline: >10 decades or until ASI is created + time for society to accept it

Cost: expensive as fuck + costs of supporting a human

8) Suicide

If this is a simulation, and _big if_ the subjects are either volunteers in a game or granted an afterlife, then suicide into an afterlife.

Realism: potentially indistinguishable from reality

Possibility: this being a simulation is very likely, but the possibility of an afterlife being provided is uncertain as fuck. the existence of brain damage makes this suspect without making assumptions about medicine wrt whole brain emulations.

Timeline: <1 hour via charcoal grills

Cost: $46 on amazon for 5 grills


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 10:34:50 [Preview] No.31479 del
>defiantly


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 14:24:27 [Preview] No.31481 del
>>31479
>not wanting to defy social and scientific expectations
realitycucking on display again. yikes!


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 14:32:02 [Preview] No.31482 del
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>>31481
but it's an adverb on an adjective. am I a grammar cuck now?


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 16:09:04 [Preview] No.31483 del
(448.49 KB 1280x720 ill show you real.jpg)
>>31481
realitycuckery in simplest sense is being unable to separate what's happening on an imageboard from what's happening in real life and the other way around
please don't misuse made up terms


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 16:15:26 [Preview] No.31484 del
>>31483
>what's happening on an imageboard from what's happening in real life and the other way around


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 16:53:35 [Preview] No.31485 del
>>31484
Lain took internet a little bit too seriously even by serious business standards


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 17:33:52 [Preview] No.31486 del
>>31483
no, realitycuckery means to be immersed in a reality in which other people are happy and fulfilled (jews) while ignoring anime and imageboards


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 20:03:13 [Preview] No.31487 del
>>31486
im jew and that's more or less normalfaggotry, original concept coming from リア充


Anonymous 05/30/2019 (Thu) 21:04:53 [Preview] No.31488 del
(1.26 MB 1280x720 martian song.mp4)
>>31487
calm down



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