>>186187
> perception I got from Katie's penultimate twitter video was that she was just cringing at herself. I do the same thing when talking to myself in a moment, telling myself not to do silly shit or cringe a bit. I've had people overhear and wonder who I'm talking too. in her I case presumed it was related to racing thoughts cause of she was high and her being an aspiring actress just regulating the bit. I get racing thoughts but I prescribe it to self diagnosed ADHD. but admittedly I only started or maybe I just noticed I was talking to myself after my friend developed psychosis and talked to the "voices". from personal experience I wouldn't call her giggly yap a sign of psychotic breakdown alone. her final joker themed vid is very ominous in hindsight, the poor girl

Her last vids were often done without music like her tiktoks, and kind of like acting bits. I remember watching them laughing and smiling, but now I can't stop watching them as a cry for help and it makes me tear up.

The worst thing is I was taking a break from twitter in this exact moment and preparing for summer, and kind of ignoring her responses. And when she posted those last suicide tweets I was weirded out but I though "she's just typing this".

I will seriously never get over this shit my friend, it ranks as top traumatic thing I ever witnessed and I swear to God, in the last messages I got from her she seemed fine and so relaxed, but I wonder if she was literally preparing to die. My feelings are a mix of incomprehension, grief, and anger, I can't explain it.