Not a single person believes you just want to be "friends". You are constantly talking about how much you love channing, are not over her, how she's the only one you have feelings for and it's not in a friendship way, not a single person believes that despite your lying. Do you think her or her husband appreciates that you are sending her those creepy emails? That isn't how "friends" speak to married "friends". If you were married would that be acceptable to you that your wife had a crazy stalker trying to tell them they loved them and constantly 'yearning" for them. Get a grip.