/ashIeyj/ - Ashley Jones

Discuss the world's funniest female comedienne, Ashley Jones. My boyfriend is the Endchan owner. Also this board has a capital i

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(194.55 KB 545x307 antiquesguy.png)
Antiques Guy vs Ashley Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 14:01 [Preview] No. 4587
(Based on a true story) One day, asking a stranger for a quick favor turns into a 90-minute hellscape fiasco.

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 14:34 [Preview] No.4589 del

why was that guy mentioning his dad so many times? :(

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 14:47 [Preview] No.4590 del
Everyone must contribute a little bit to the following sentence.
>One time my dad and I...

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 14:47 [Preview] No.4591 del
Cool story and cute doggo

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 15:38 [Preview] No.4592 del
(3.74 MB 1280x720 tummy.mp4)
my honest reaction

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 15:47 [Preview] No.4593 del
(8.47 KB 200x200 yoba-front.jpg)
Finally someone asked Ashley to reach something at the top of the shelf.
Antiques Guy looks like yoba in OP.

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 16:22 [Preview] No.4594 del
Jealous of the guy ash picked to make videos with her

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 16:48 [Preview] No.4595 del
Probably your best video yet Ash, keep up the great work!

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 17:26 [Preview] No.4596 del

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 18:36 [Preview] No.4598 del
I like that slight smile you made after saying the the word "nigger".

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 20:35 [Preview] No.4599 del
Ashley, I liked your hair. Can't wait to pull it as you tell me "No, don't stop." I really want to go thrifting with you now. I promise I will keep you and won't flip you to a sex trafficker.

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 20:45 [Preview] No.4600 del
His dad taught him everything he knows. He was just trying to pass along his arcane secrets to Ashley. Ngl, I meet guys like this all the time at comic shops. You talk to them once and they act like your dog when you finally arrive home everytime they see you. I think it's because their dad told them what to do all the time and they don't know any better so they get attached easily to others when their dad is no longer in the picture.

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 21:21 [Preview] No.4602 del
that's what I thought :(
poor guys, we need to bring back bullying maybe that would help

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 21:21 [Preview] No.4603 del
Ashley looks like Uncle Eddie from Grounded for Life. https://youtube.com/watch?v=zZPp8yiosUQ [Embed]

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 22:16 [Preview] No.4604 del
the 70s vintage hair is appropriate for the video but I like it shorter

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 22:55 [Preview] No.4605 del
that Hey hey he Hey Hey Hey Hey straight into another bs story part cracked me up

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 23:14 [Preview] No.4606 del
This is actually a great explanation. I've encountered guys like this too. You can tell they're a little off, psychologically. But you're nice to them just to be polite. Then, they think you're their new best friend. Describing it like a dog after you just get home is exactly what it's like.

My first experience like this was in high school. There was this kid who was an extremely late bloomer, something like 14-15 and clearly hadn't hit puberty, so of course people made fun of him. To top it off he was a big teacher's pet and just generally weird. Picking your nose and eating it kind of weird. I can't remember the exact details but I think some other kid was making fun of him, and I took pity I guess you could say, so I stuck up for him. I felt bad for this poor hairless boy who was constantly getting shit on. That can't be an easy life.

It was a huge mistake, because he followed me everywhere after that. As an adult now I can see he was probably just desperate for a friend, but when I was a kid I was already nowhere near one of the "cool kids" and I was freaked out that this smooth little weirdo was getting his stink all over me. It was hard enough trying to get laid as a teenager without all the girls knowing your best pal is the prepubescent honor roll student. I'm pretty sure I just avoided him to the extreme until he got the message.

I switched schools the next year, so I don't know if he ever hit puberty. Maybe he's still wandering around out there, picking his nose and enjoying the silky-smooth feel of his scrotum. Who knows.

Thank you for reading my blog.

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 23:37 [Preview] No.4607 del
If you can only get the Carl's Jr. hat by working there, then how did Ashley get one? Was Ashley a burger flipper?

Anonymous 01/15/2023 (Sun) 23:45 [Preview] No.4608 del
She's a bean flipper.

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 00:28 [Preview] No.4609 del
Any particular reason you chose to wear this shirt, Ashley? I always thought it was funny he gave her lines for eyes. Lol, subtle racism.

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 00:36 [Preview] No.4610 del
(263.75 KB 1092x529 hatflip.png)
Fuck Yo I'm Eating™

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 00:55 [Preview] No.4611 del
>2 close encounters with sex traffickers
This actually concerns me. Do you carry anything on you to protect yourself against any creeps you meet IRL?

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 01:36 [Preview] No.4612 del
(369.24 KB 923x468 scads of buckaroos.png)
Turns out that shirt is worth scads of buckaroos

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 02:40 [Preview] No.4613 del

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 03:05 [Preview] No.4614 del
Assuming she at least has pepper spray or something

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 03:06 [Preview] No.4615 del
that little look over towards the camera as walks over to the shelf to get something for Ashley (around 1m24sec mark) is like he is thinking to himself "time to work my magic, educate this youngin, ok"

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 03:50 [Preview] No.4617 del
Spicy Mexican farts are the best form of self defense

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 05:18 [Preview] No.4618 del
I think the coyotes have an immunity to that. She might get trafficked

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 05:41 [Preview] No.4619 del

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 10:52 [Preview] No.4621 del
These facebook-tier posts are admirable. Never change, Seabee.

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 10:54 [Preview] No.4622 del
That's a fake listing. You can't buy those, after someone quits working at Carls Jr. their hat disappears.

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 12:10 [Preview] No.4623 del
How old is he

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 12:22 [Preview] No.4624 del
(412.98 KB 1400x969 bros.jpg)

I like to imagine that Antiques Guy and Barry would be great friends.

Antiques Guy would get to ramble on about flipping, antiques, etc and Barry would be content just listening, happy to be away from his wife, Linda, and sipping on a cold one, occasionally replying "Yep" to one of Antiques Guy's many stories of which Barry never understands as, lets be honest, Barry is a bit of a dumbass (he did eat lead paint chips after all).
Every now and again Barry would begin complaining to Antiques Guy about his wife or how young people are lazy, only to have Antiques Guy sharply interrupt with a "My Dad and I..." story or sometimes just plainly telling Barry to "Shut the fuck up, ok" but its never meant in a mean way.
Even though Antiques Guy may sometimes come across as being rude to Barry, Barry doesn't mind at all and on Sundays Barry invites Antiques Guy over to his big house and the two get together to watch the football game (even though Antiques Guy has no interest in football)
Barry hopes one day to invite Antiques Guy to one of his boys only trips where they sleep in the same tent and "hunt for deers"

It would be a strange friendship, with neither ever realizing, let alone understanding what bonds their friendship together. But a great friendship that would last many years.

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 12:37 [Preview] No.4625 del
This is great. We saw little cameos of Barry and Linda at the end of the tranny movie, so maybe she'll bring them back? Barry and antiques guy would definitely get along.

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 15:40 [Preview] No.4626 del
This video had too much fucking. Or not enough, I can't remember. Anyway, I give it a four out of five.

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 19:20 [Preview] No.4628 del
(505.82 KB 779x699 ash.PNG)
She is so cute bros

Anonymous 01/16/2023 (Mon) 20:46 [Preview] No.4629 del
she looks like a 18 guy lmao

Anonymous 01/17/2023 (Tue) 03:35 [Preview] No.4640 del
She's too cute. She gives me chest pains.

Anonymous 01/17/2023 (Tue) 04:46 [Preview] No.4643 del

Anonymous 01/17/2023 (Tue) 04:47 [Preview] No.4644 del
(141.43 KB 1050x805 TheIceman.jpg)
I knew a girl in high school who kinda looked like Ashley in that pic. Her dad also looked like the serial killer Richard Kuklinski which was both intimidating but also kinda funny to me because I used to watch documentaries about him and other killers (criminology fascinates me, I'm not dangerous) so whenever I went to their house for dinner it always felt a bit eerie since I thought each meal would be my last before being strangled to death.

Anonymous 01/17/2023 (Tue) 05:06 [Preview] No.4646 del
I'm very sorry Canadabro, I'm playing with board's flags and accidentally enabled location flags, but now they're off and the location flags have still stayed. I am also not dangerous.

Anonymous 01/17/2023 (Tue) 05:08 [Preview] No.4647 del
I already knew he was a fucking leaf.

Anonymous 01/17/2023 (Tue) 05:22 [Preview] No.4648 del
(27.71 KB 678x514 ScottThompson.jpg)
All good. It just shows that you have fans from around the world. Your return has kept me warm during this cold, bitter season.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=LqQCyAQBgXY [Embed]

Anonymous 01/17/2023 (Tue) 17:52 [Preview] No.4658 del
Leafs are fine. They get a bad rap because it’s all chinks

Anonymous 01/18/2023 (Wed) 04:00 [Preview] No.4675 del
East Indians as well. They're generally contained in major cities though. There's less of them in small towns and rural areas which is nice.

Anonymous 01/19/2023 (Thu) 12:13 [Preview] No.4706 del
(439.21 KB 1057x668 thats-gotta-hurt.jpg)
people are saying she wears a wig in this, I thought her hair had just grown to that length?
Also, you can get troll dolls that you stick on the end of pencils. And when I said "stick on the end of pencils" I meant you ram that pencil up the trolls ass.

And anyone else slowmo replay certain shots, hoping to see some sweet, sweet Ashley sideboob?
No?... just me? Cant be!

Anonymous 01/19/2023 (Thu) 12:16 [Preview] No.4707 del
>And anyone else slowmo replay certain shots, hoping to see some sweet, sweet Ashley sideboob?
I'll settle for nothing less than Ashley frontboob. She best be pluckin' those nips though.

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 05:51 [Preview] No.4737 del
(25.33 KB 461x378 ky.jpg)
It's training day boyos. What are you guys stuffing in your intestines today?

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 07:00 [Preview] No.4738 del
There’s no homos here you retarded nigger!

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 17:43 [Preview] No.4752 del
Just got my training butt baby in. I'm training to store cardboard cutouts in my intestines. Maybe I'll steal a camping tent or deflated inflatable raft and shove that right up into my colon. The possibilities are endless! Well, if by endless I mean 7ft of intestines. If something ever gets too far stuck up there you just pop a laxative and you'll find it in no time.

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 17:46 [Preview] No.4753 del
Hey pal there's nothing homosexual about training your anus to store thousands of dollars worth of valuable treasures. I haven't found too many treasures yet, but when I do I know I will be ready because I've been training a lot lately.

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 17:55 [Preview] No.4755 del
Guys, I don't know what it is but it feels really good when I train. Maybe it's because I know I'm going to make thousands of dollars.

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 18:50 [Preview] No.4758 del
(712.62 KB 852x480 pug.mp4)
She likes pugs because they help her normalize her fas

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 20:17 [Preview] No.4764 del
n1 anon, saved

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 20:23 [Preview] No.4765 del
After all those comments of hers during the streams, I now cannot stop thinking that she is the only one posting these

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 21:02 [Preview] No.4766 del
It is really gay, homos enjoy that because that’s how they fantasize and practice so they can get rammed form behind. It’s also unhealthy and dangerous.

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 21:07 [Preview] No.4767 del
This guys trying to prevent us from getting THOUSANDS. Don't listen to him, brothers.

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 23:06 [Preview] No.4768 del

Anonymous 01/22/2023 (Sun) 23:06 [Preview] No.4769 del

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 00:06 [Preview] No.4770 del
I love the way she raises her voice 0:06-0:19. Oh no, I think I have an Ashley voice fetish.

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 00:44 [Preview] No.4771 del
I like her accent, she reminds me of Clarice Starling from Silence Of The Lambs the way she pronounces certain words, most notably the ones with Rs in them.

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 02:04 [Preview] No.4772 del
Yea, I know. I always liked the sound of her voice and her accent even going back to 2014.

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 03:04 [Preview] No.4773 del
I don't recommend losing thousands on medical bills. Injuring your anus or someones is expensive.

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 06:44 [Preview] No.4776 del
That's just called an investment. You have to spend money to make money.

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 12:11 [Preview] No.4779 del
I want to see a TV show with Antiques Guy traveling across country, thrifting and flipping, whilst Ashley Jones reluctantly tags along because she is too polite to say that she has to leave.

Thinking of trying to make a commercial for it too. Unsure how it will turn out as my video editing skills suck plus I need a voice over work for it. Maybe a txt to speech will be sufficient

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 12:58 [Preview] No.4780 del
Anon this is a masterpiece. Their slight painted look lends well to these types of covers. The lore one needs to fully appreciate this cover. It's awesome. Is alien anon willing to lend his voice for a commercial?

Anonymous 01/23/2023 (Mon) 16:42 [Preview] No.4781 del
>Super Casino Twin Pack
Nice throw back

Anonymous 01/25/2023 (Wed) 11:09 [Preview] No.4800 del
Im just going to see if I can make it a decent commercial first before I ask for any VA, but he would probably do a good job of it.

I wonder if shes got any new/old games recently from thrifting

So I need a tagline for the ad.
What sounds better
A. Thrift, Buy and Flip
B. Thrift and Flip

and follow the tagline after with something like "With the masters of flipping. American Flippers, starts Wednesday 10pm Only on the History channel.

I want A because it has 3 words, but unsure if Buy is the right word.
So it go
Voice-over: Thrift
>clip of show
Voice-over: Buy
>clip of show
Voice-over: and flip
>clip of show
Voice-over: With the masters of flipping

Anonymous 01/25/2023 (Wed) 12:27 [Preview] No.4801 del
Whoever did the last one wasn’t alienon. I think he might have moved on. I don’t think he has posted since November

Anonymous 01/25/2023 (Wed) 18:20 [Preview] No.4802 del
Alienon has been dead for years

Anonymous 01/25/2023 (Wed) 20:13 [Preview] No.4806 del
(23.28 KB 960x1440 26516566745.webp)
he was abducted

Anonymous 01/25/2023 (Wed) 22:22 [Preview] No.4809 del
The new alienoon has a much deeper, sexier dulcet voice (it’s me btw)

Anonymous 01/25/2023 (Wed) 23:50 [Preview] No.4813 del
(1.51 MB 600x480 1664123777731279.webm)

The Collective Unconscious

Anonymous 01/25/2023 (Wed) 23:52 [Preview] No.4814 del
(2.79 MB 960x540 1664841818571999.webm)
The Collective Unconscious

With Vocaroo link


Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 01:38 [Preview] No.4819 del
Me too. I'm working on getting a job too. Been cutting into my internet funds since my trumpbuxx dried up. You can always be a single mom and apply for FAFSA to go back to school. Take the opportunity to learn a new skill and enjoy spending your leftover funds on things other than getting your nails and hair done.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 01:46 [Preview] No.4820 del
I forgot to mention, I had a cherry bomb blow up in my hand once. Lucky for me, I didn't lose any fingers. I escaped with only a burn on my palm. It had a faulty fuse. It exploded as soon as I lit it.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 01:51 [Preview] No.4821 del
my friend had an M80 do that very thing..He said the moment he lit it he knew it was a quick fuse..and as he threw it it went off and he said he could tell by the shock wave that went threw his that it would have blown his fingers off if it had went off..for my self, i used to do a lot of firework wars..woudl bring a sling shot and cigar and loss those fuckers at people, once i had a fuse blow back from a bottle rocket and hit my eyelid..that was end of my fire work wars.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 02:01 [Preview] No.4822 del
getting your hands blown off would suck since you're basically useless by that point. I saw a video of some teens fucking around with fireworks at some car show and one of them lost their vision while the other lost both of his hands. No more playing videogames, no more jerking off, no more piecing together Gundam action figures, may as well off yourself.


Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 02:16 [Preview] No.4823 del
Yeah, I had a smoke bomb blow up on me while I was playing paintball innawoods with my friends. I almost lost an eye as a kid because I threw I spray can into a fire and it exploded. I was hit in the face with shrapnel and the spray nozzle hit me square between the eyes. One in a million shot. The funny thing was, after I had threw it into the fire, I was clear across the yard and it still hit me. I was helping my grandfather burn yard debris and he had no idea I had threw it in the fire. When it exploded, he dropped to the ground like they taught him in the military, lmao. I've also been shot and heard the bullets zipping by me but not one hit me. I didn't know what it was and then my neighbors freaked out when they saw a kid walk out from the woods down range. They were shooting paper targets. All of this has added to my sense of invincibility. Which is not necessarily a good thing, not trying to boast, but I'm braver than most. It didn't help being popped by lightning either. I kind of believe that things happen for a reason now. I don't know whether it's destiny, fate or karma or guarian angels but I've had too many close calls for it just to be dumb luck.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 02:21 [Preview] No.4824 del
>Gundam action figures
You mean model kits, right? I actual prefer the action figures because they are already built and you can play with them and make noises like an autistic child. I have quite the Gundam collection, anon.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=3-ZUDtaGf3I [Embed]

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 03:27 [Preview] No.4828 del
(440.68 KB 1200x1394 jill + chris.jpg)
I don't own any action figures or model railway, planes, etc. but I enjoy looking at them at flea markets. I did see unopened packages of Jill Valentine and Chris Redfield from Resident Evil each for like $20. I still regret not buying them to this day because that's the cheapest I've seen them go for.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 04:36 [Preview] No.4834 del
I found this at the local flea market for a few bucks. I found out it was rare and going for over $100 online. I wanted to open it but opted for waiting until I came across a loose one and reselling this one and it was stolen from me. If I had opened it, it would have never been taken, lmao. The thief only took my figures still in the package, not my loose stuff.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 04:59 [Preview] No.4835 del
(3.92 MB 3120x4160 IMG_20221209_114509.jpg)
Btw, I'm a big fan of Mad Max. "My dad and I" (lol) used to watch these when I was a kid. I was a fan before it was cool. Parts of Agent Game were filmed in my city and Mel Gibson stayed at the inn right across from my apartment. I hope I meet him someday so I can tell him that I tried to meet him before when he was my neighbor for a few days. This inn isn't huge like a hotel or resort, it's tiny compared to others but it's world famous and lots of celebrities stay there. My friend lived in the same apartment building that I did. He walked outside one evening to get into his car and Rihanna was just sitting on the steps and he thought he was hallucinating. Pic related is the last "celebrity" I saw. My friend got to meet him.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 12:12 [Preview] No.4839 del
>it was stolen from me
Wouldn’t have happened if you were storing it in your colon

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 22:42 [Preview] No.4844 del
(62.72 KB 554x640 geodude.jpg)
But that's where I keep my geodes.

Anonymous 01/26/2023 (Thu) 22:56 [Preview] No.4845 del
>The fuckin ill transparency pattern leggings

Anonymous 01/27/2023 (Fri) 01:50 [Preview] No.4849 del
>So I need a tagline for the ad.
>What sounds better
>A. Thrift, Buy and Flip
>B. Thrift and Flip

So A or B?

??? i dont see any leggings?

Anonymous 01/27/2023 (Fri) 03:55 [Preview] No.4854 del
Flip your shit

Anonymous 01/27/2023 (Fri) 04:56 [Preview] No.4857 del
Speaking of flipping shit. I worked with a guy who flipped houses on the side and he would come across some cool stuff abandoned by their previous owners. One day when I was helping him out we came across some old penthouse magazines, a Coca-Cola cooler, Zippo lighter, a tricycle and some tools left in a rotted shed. It was all vintage too so he got some extra money out of that. I wish I grabbed that Zippo before he did...

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