i can't imagine what it must feel like to be ashley right now. your mom chose the other qt brown comedy girl over you. the daughter she wishes she truly had. she probably calls taylor weekly to check up on her and to make sure she doesn't need anything. oh shit nigga, you better post a funny non green screen video and fast or else your mother is going to die in her sleep tonight

>>2859
I cannot piece this together in my head
no idea man

Are Ashley and Taylor related??

>>2869
not really, it's just weird that a boomer would know who she is. maybe she's trying to become internet savvy to bond with Ashley

I was going to call bullshit but that account goes back to 2012? I am le baffled.

>>2860
Seriously, maybe the problem in their relationship is that Ash wasn't based enough.

>>2879
I think Ash was based enough but not only that, she was well grounded.

reading through these tweets is a trip. greatness really does skip a generation.

>>2881
honestly, if real, i'm kind of into her now. she almost equidistant to me in age as ash is.

>>2888
i just want ash but her mom can take us to dairy queen for tendies

Go to Dairy Queen for the Tendies but stay for the Peanut Butter Sundae. Unfortunately only some Dairy Queens serve Pepsi.

>>2888
old ass nigga. I'm gonna call Seabee dad and you grandpa from now on.
I can't believe grandma said that offenisve epithet 10 years ago on twitter. we must call her work and get her fired.

>>2889
me and mary will drop you kids off and then go get $1 drink drunk at applebees.

>>2888
>>2893
there's no way you can steal Ashley's mom, she takes marriage very seriously and would never ever betray her husband

>>2894
ashley pls

>>2894
probably the best joke ever made around here

>>2892
That's it, son, you're out of my will. Now if you'll excuse me it's bingo night at the senior center and I'm feeling lucky. Now where did I put my Cialis.

>>2894
when i say i want to be ashley's daddy, that's not what i mean

>>2897
pops tell us again about that time you were in the jungle near Saigon and charlie came out of the trees all around you

>>2899
I could tell you about the "time" but I'd have to change jungle to desert, Saigon to Paktika Province, Afghanistan and Charlie to Abdul.
Talking about Vietnam though when my enlistment was up in 2014 I bought a house and was in my driveway washing my car and a guy walks over from a house across the road. He was about 70 with long scraggly hippie hair wearing an old Vietnam Marine jungle jacket with peace signs on it. He welcomed me to the neighborhood and asked if I was former military and I answered in the affirmative. I asked if he was a former Marine judging by his jacket and he answered in the affirmative saying that he did 3 tours in Vietnam. Marines and Seabees always got along really good and were really tight and he asked me if I wanted to get high. I said I'll have a beer with him and I got a 6 pack from the fridge. I gave him a beer and he took a joint out of his pocket and lit it. He was an interesting guy and still talked like a hippie and telling me flashbacks from Vietnam. We became good friends but unfortunately he's in a VA hospital now not doing too good. I visit him once in a while but his mind is failing and only remembers me once in a while.

>>2902
that's actually really cool, I hope he gets better but he must be pretty old. was he into the music scene back then? I'd kill at least 3 people to go back in time and see woodstock.

>>2903
My friend is in his 80s now and not doing good, drifts in and out of reality. I know someone who buys pot so when I visit him at the VA I give him a few joints. He's in a wheelchair so I push him outside away from everyone and he lights up.
When he was well I'd go to his house and he had all these old albums and a turn table. He'd light up, I'd have a beer and we'd listen to Hendrix, Zeppelin, The Doors Procol Harum, Jefferson Airplane. He said that The Doors were the best to get high to and that the Beatles were British sissies. He said that if he wasn't in Nam he would have gone to Woodstock.
When I visit him at the VA he talks about Nam. For sure my experiences in Afghanistan can't hold a candle to the shit he went through in Nam. He's got headphones and I got him an MP3 player and I recorded some of his favorite bands that I mentioned. With the joints and the music it kind of takes the edge off for him.

>>2905
he sounds awesome, very good music taste as well. I used to be obsessed with psychedelic rock although I've never done drugs, but should I ever decide to resort to that to cope with life I know Strange Days would be the first thing on the list.
I respect both you and him for that btw, although I disagree with both of those wars, that's the fault of the government not the soldiers. I have a lot of air force people in my family, my grandpa also fought in Vietnam. I thought about doing it myself but I decided my calling in life was elsewhere. that's cool that you go out of your way to do that stuff for him.

>>2906
Yes, I disagree with both wars too. I enlisted at the time because I was just out of high school full of piss and vinegar and it seemed like a good idea at the time. Now I'm a Monday morning quarterback. Now I'm afraid that the ass hole in the white house is going to get us involved in the Ukraine with Russia. The only reason Biden wants to help Ukraine, one of the most corrupt countries in eastern Europe, is because Biden's son was put on the energy board in the Ukraine at $90,000 a month when Biden was vice president. It was just done to garner favor with Biden's position as vice president.
Kudos to your grandpa for his service in Vietnam. They were all brave men who served under harsh conditions and when they returned home this country gave them the finger. It's only been recently that the Vietnam vets are finally getting the honor and respect that they deserve.

>>2907
I hadn't thought of that about Ukraine before, you're definitely right. it's never about "saving the poor country from being invaded", there's always some other reason. I'm not too worried though since it's mostly just Bidet's personal stakes, and we all know he's not the one actually calling the shots. now if it was Israel that was in jeopardy we'd all be getting drafted lol. except for gramps, he gets to stay behind with Ashley's mom.

oh shit, i forgot taylor got her old account back so her old videos are back up

My Guide To Daddy Dom
https://twitter.com/nudeobama/status/1055874933476155392

ashley, listen to me bb. i'm running out of time, there is a 0.02% chance i could die of covid tonight. this could be our last time together on this gay earth. the crapposts and vocaroo are nice but i'm thinking we could go all the way tonight. it's a monday. that means pizza. post a bideo bb i want to see that full body rash

>>2910
Ashley what do you think about that eyebrow distance? is that about right?

>>2912
A beautiful,melancholy song that says so much in so short a time celebrating the camaraderie and respect that develops among men who have faced the hazards of war. Thanks for posting.

>>2911
at least she still has her eyebrows and they weren't singed off by crazy

>>2913
Would make a good sitcom

>>2914
She probably scared them away when she looked into the mirror

>>2920
that's basically what MASH was

>>2925
i wish we could grow lab meat from her bunion cultures and then eat big juicy ashley steaks in front of starving third world kids.

>>2930
it finally happened - i fucked up an undeletable reply

>>2931
it's all over. you'll never live this down.

btw all you have to do is put something into the password field before you post

>>2930
we could get Guga to experiment with them

>>2860
>i can't imagine what it must feel like to be ashley right now. your mom chose the other qt brown comedy girl over you. the daughter she wishes she truly had

Ashley in a desperate attempt to regain her liberal, democrat loving mother, went out an bought a Kamala Harris 2024 tshirt.
Sad really.

damn I totally thought that was a new pic for a second

When I think about those nights in Cozumel
I get the sweetest thoughts of you and me
Memories of love above the city lights
Oh, I've tried so hard to take it
But alone my heart won't make it
I just wanna stop
And tell you what I feel about you, babe
I just wanna stop
I never wanna live without you,babe
I just gotta stop
For your love
For your love....right now

>>2957
why'd you change it to Cozumel? I thought that was OC at first when google returned nothing

Because our girl is holding her Cozumel shirt

>>2959
sorry don't mind me I'm retarded

>>2954
heh

oh that just gave me an art idea

ashley, is running on fumes now. she better have a beanie baby with some lucky cuck before the vaxx hauls her eggs off to auschwitz

>>2965
when is her birthday, asking for a friend

>>2969
i don't feel comfortable leaking her birthday, she an Aquarius tho if you believe in Babylonian space magic

>>2970
I knew those bastards were lying about her being 14

Listen here baby boi, you quit calling my son a cuck and stalking my daughter or else I'm taking you by the ear and we're going to have a serious talk inside about your behavior. This is your final warning. Don't let me catch you with your pants down!

>>2972
daddy who was that scary man?

>>2972
>ashley's mom will never berate you for being a bad boyfriend to ashley while she eagerly wanks you off in the broom closer while ashley is sleeping on the sofa just a few feet away

Aquarians are known for embracing their creativity and individuality even if it makes them stand out in a strange or unorthodox way from others.

>>2972
Oh my, I had no idea Ashley had a younger sister. May I offer you a G-fuel and a Slim Jim? (the meat stick is my weenus)

I bet if we kept posting how hot Ashley's mom was, her mom would eventually find out and post hotter pics of herself. Maybe she would even post here? I say this because in high school, we had a substitute teacher that all the guys thought was hot and she eventually found out from her son who was embarrassed over it but instead of making a big deal of it she started wearing hotter outfits, lmao. Imagine how Ashley would feel having her mom steal all her glorious attention? Ashley, you're circling the drain, better post share some pp. I mean, where is uncut? He's probably not even orbiting you any longer. Last i heard, he was in some discord server simping over some no talent egirls.

>>2993
the truth is I always intended to use Ashley to get to her mom

>>2995
i'm using her mom to get to her dad. going get in tight with that tamale by wrecking his ex.

>>3006
the ol' square dance with ex spouses. not for the faint of heart.

>>2995
Why not just wait until Ashley matures? Lordy, lordy look who's 40?

>>3009
gourmet meme

>>2972
Its late...

Im swiping left, Im swiping right, Im swiping left again

when suddenly she appears, like a sunrise breaking thru the horizon at dawn she is sunshine to my eyes


...Im blinded by her radiant beauty

>>3116
Mama always told me not to look into the eyes of the sun
But Mama, that's where the fun is
Blinded by the light
Revved up like a Deuce
Another runner in the night

>>3116
You mean to tell me a woman like that is still single and doesn't have any mutt kids?

>>3122
she aint single but just cause there's a goalie doesn't mean you can't score

>>3122
No, she does have at least one daughter that I'm aware of

>>3124
Her dad is probably some Puerto Rican guy

guys nobody post so the post count stays at 69

>>3128
this meme is so stupid but I can't help but love it

lol

This is my first time so forgive me if I'm not Canadian or Jewish enough to be doing this. Ashley, your mom may be hot, but I can still roast her. Your mom looks like a former porn actress who came out of retirement to star in milf videos because her second marriage to some guy she met at the bar of a casual dining restaurant failed. This photo looks like it's taken from her crappy facebook where she shows off her hobby no one is interested in that she's mistaken for her actual talent she's paid for. Her porn name is probably Mary Kay because she wears cheap makeup and does facials. The kind of woman that thinks knowing how to mix hamburger helper makes her wife material. I bet your mom relies on Betty Crocker because she really identifies with being moist and easy. j/k Ashley, your mom seems like a nice lady and I look forward to getting a blowjob from her in the future.

>>3134
the dude in the games is not Ash unfortunately, his mom is not a brown tomboy, although she is still a milf

>>3138
8/10

>>3138
Mary's 42. Just the right age for me to make another Ash with her, but this time twice as autistic.

>>3142
damn she's only 42? I thought she was like 50. did she get knocked up at 17 or something?

She's 45. She had Nathan at 21

>>3147
it's still worth a try anon! I /b/lieve in you

I hear Ash listens to Dean Martin https://youtube.com/watch?v=wWOhQ2NERlg [Embed]

Ash do you still like Queen?
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Ds6iqGEtwGs [Embed]

>>3163
this one sucks actually. I could do a way better freddie than that fag.
maybe I should make some of these videos for easy millions of views.

>>3163
Is that the joke because Ashley told me she didn't like Queen??
>>3164
Yeah, this one sucks. I wonder if we could get Marc Martel to do it? You know a song I would love to hear Freddie Mercury sing? Evil Woman by Electric Light Orchestra

>>3166
yeah lol in one of the streams someone I assume mentioned Queen in the chat and she almost viscerally responded I HATE QUEEN with such a spiteful glint in her eyes
that may have been the exact moment I fell for her
anyway I do not think you can get Marc Martel to do it, but you can get me to do it (if Ashley posts a voice recording and/or video)

>>3161
Yeah she does, Everybody loves somebody sometime.

>>3167
She hates Queen because Queen reminds her of Britain and we know how the Ash feels about the Brits.
The only time I've seen her angrier was when someone referred to soda as pop and that really set her off and heatedly replied that it's called soda not pop. Man, I love her when she gets angry.