The water heater broke down months ago. Arguments over whether repairing it still flare up on occasion, even though the charred remains of the heater have been designated as a memetic hazard and quarantined.

The latest jury-rigged solution involves a vat of mineral oil, several hundred GPUs, and an entire fabricated altcoin bubble. Two residents work in shifts to prop up the hype via sockpuppet accounts. The current value of their increasingly precarious portfolio can be inferred from the temperature of the tap water.