It's sort of ironic that despite everything I am back in the same situation again, though I am still interacting on here. I am again trying to enter the world, being annoyed at how I don't understand how it's done, having too much weight on my mind and not even really wanting to because of things I feel I need to do first. But at one point it will have to be.

This time I'm not going in blind, I'm preparing this way ahead, not moving until I already have an awareness in the other direction, being able to recall my skills. It made sense to not do this before, but now, if I can just feel "done" properly here, it won't be a problem to recall it, as I'd then know I am not missing anything.