This girl I had a huge crush for years and ‘dated’ in grade school, who looks a lot like Agatha actually, got engaged recently and when I heard about it I pulled out some old photos of us and I’m actually devastated about this, as dumb as it might sound. It feels like my life ended before it even started, none of us are getting any younger here. I have facial tourettes, a bevy of weird aliments, allergies and pains, heavy OCD and otherwise crippling neurosis that I couldn’t explain. In university I actually had some pull with girls but scared them off by being spergy, haven’t maintained meaningful contact with anyone from when I was working my ass off for this degree but have since been unable to find work because shit-eating, incompetent pajeets with fake credentials have swamped everything in my field with no end in sight, still living with my single mom who seems done with my shit. What the fuck did I ever do to deserve any of this? I was never supposed to be here and I think roping might be on the table for me in the coming years, if not months