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Anonymous 04/02/2024 (Tue) 00:46 [Preview] No. 57042
Q's guide to ZERO inflation:

Fecal Retention, Cleansing and Reintroduction--Steps Included

Every person feels Biden's heavy Devil hand on their wallet now. It's no surpise you can't afford water, you can't even afford to eat! There's an age-old trick to prevent running out of something; using a little less. Your body takes roughly 18 hours to properly digest your food, however it can produce a fecal product in less than 10. This means you should hold in your "waste" for as long as possible, remember that if necessary the body will void bowels against your will. THIS is when you are actually full, because the body processes nutrients for AS LONG AS FOOD IS PRESENT.

Anonymous 04/02/2024 (Tue) 01:04 [Preview] No.57043 del
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Now that your body has finished the first try, this is the important part. DO NOT use a toilet. I've found the best place is a napkin, a nice thick one from McDonald's is best (and free!!) so grab at least two, and "hold the line" as they say in the military. Stick the product on something a little firm afterwards and wash up, time to clean the feces. This has two purposes; one to get rid of the vaccines, two to make the product easier on the stomach. Upon Reintroduction the stomach is usually upset it isn't being served more fine caviar or something, and gets a little upset and painful. If you have issues, you likely did not Clean long enough. First you need to boil the product feces and get a nice soup going. Drain but DO NOT strain, as this could end up backfiring and washing away more product than contaminant. If it completely liquifies you made an error, try again. Next you'll need some Powdered Milk, some call it Dry Milk or other terms, coat the product with it GENTLY and not too much. Next you need to store it in something special--a Handy Dandy Mason Jar is perfect. Use Milk of Magnesia, and Pressure Can it on HIGH (important).

Anonymous 04/02/2024 (Tue) 01:25 [Preview] No.57044 del
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Everyone knows Ramen is great for you, but there's one thing it's missing--Meat! Ramen is only a buck a piece (ask the clerk for a discount though, sometimes they have markdowns closer to the Restock Date on the package) so it's perfect for making this a quick fix. Boil the water first, add the noodles and flavor and let the Product just warm up a bit. The best part is you can do this literally forever! When your body actually ABSORBS all of the feces it is GONE, so every time you get new Grade A Meat! It goes great with some warm "Lemonade," just add some sugar! I eat this at least once a day and it saves me 4$ since it's basically just Ramen, and it fills you up like a 28$ steak!

Anonymous 04/03/2024 (Wed) 00:55 [Preview] No.57045 del
Q's guide to ZERO inflation:

Plants are Fucking Free (How-To guide)

Everyone knows plants cost literally zero dollars. Why are you buying from the grocery store like a slave Demoncrat? Put a seed in the ground and wait, don't be a Democrat about things. Plant FACTS:

Growing does not cost money. 0$
Rain is free water retard. 0$
While waiting I have some free tips to help the plants. 0 (ZERO FUCKING) $ (DOLLARS)

The only things you need for plants are good dirt (ask any farmer) and the plant. A bit of sunshine and luck and you're done. So how do you make good dirt? The reason dirt becomes "healthier" is because there are more "nutrients" for the plant to absorb when water is transferred through it. How does dirt get nutrients? Dead plant matter and animal "waste." You can help this along with things like fertilizer, but fertilizing a single plant can cost 50$, woah there retard, plants are FREE. They cost NOTHING. Make your own fertilizer instead with these helpful tips:

1. Poop and urinate on the ground where you intend to grow
2. Gather the "waste (leftovers)" and dehydrate the Product in an Excalibur II Dehydrator (I found mine in a dumpster behind Big Lots, FREE)
3. Grind up the product in a coffee grinder
4. Mix liberally with soil

Now while you are waiting, another FREE tip: Kill the Bugs. Do not use expensive insecticides like some Big Shots suggest, but do it the old-fashioned tried and true classical way of just going to the plant and crushing them with your hand. Don't be lazy, get to work like a real farmer!

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