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/cyc/ - general Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 13:42 [Preview] No. 88444
slurpage edition

>Current and upcoming road races
08.05 - 31.05 Giro d'Italia 2.UWT
20.05 - 24.05 4 Jours de Dunkerque / Grand Prix des Hauts de France 2.Pro
21.05 - 24.05 Vuelta a Burgos Feminas 2.WWT
22.05 - 24.05 Grande Prémio Internacional Beiras e Serra da Estrela 2.1
24.05 Grand Prix Criquielion 1.1
24.05 Antwerp Port Epic Ladies 1.Pro
25.05 Antwerp Port Epic / Sels Trophy 1.1
25.05 GP Mazda Schelkens 1.1 WE
28.05 - 31.05 Boucles de la Mayenne - Crédit Mutuel 2.Pro
29.05 - 31.05 Bretagne Ladies Tour 2.1
30.05 - 07.06 Giro d'Italia Women 2.WWT
01.06 - 05.06 Ethias-Tour de Wallonie 2.Pro
03.06 Mercan'Tour Classic Alpes-Maritimes 1.1
04.06 - 06.06 Tour of Estonia 2.1
06.06 Heylen Vastgoed Heistse Pijl 1.1
07.06 Brussels Cycling Classic 1.Pro
07.06 Dwars door de Westhoek 1.1 WE
07.06 Alpes Gresivaudan Classic 1.1 WE
07.06 - 14.06 Tour Auvergne - Rhône-Alpes 2.UWT
10.06 Circuit Franco-Belge 1.Pro
12.06 - 14.06 CIC-Tour Féminin des Pyrénées 2.Pro
13.06 Copenhagen Sprint 1.WWT
14.06 Copenhagen Sprint 1.UWT
14.06 GP Gippingen 1.1
14.06 Muur Classic Geraardsbergen 1.1
17.06 - 21.06 Tour de Suisse 2.UWT
17.06 - 21.06 Baloise Belgium Tour 2.Pro

>Mecha-Rusbert's webm folders:
https://pastebin.com/Mx1GyU53 (embed)

>Bert van Koers' ciclismo quizzes:
https://www.sporcle.com/user/Bert_van_Koers/quizzes/

>Races info:
https://www.procyclingstats.com/
https://firstcycling.com/

>Free streams:
https://cyclingtiz.live/
https://dlhd.pk/

>Velodrama league code:
51196855

>Previous Thread:
>>87447


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:37 [Preview] No.88481 del
first for break wins


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:47 [Preview] No.88490 del
Record time for my escape from the last thread


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:47 [Preview] No.88491 del
c'mooooon give the break some motopacing


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:47 [Preview] No.88492 del
honestly some juicy chutes is about the only entertainment we could get out of this stage
alright the sprint teams may still chute but its not the same if there's no gc on the line


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:47 [Preview] No.88493 del
Kubis reduced to some chasing jobber


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:48 [Preview] No.88494 del
(1.67 MB 1280x720 videoframe_6509942.png)
dink dink dink dink


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:49 [Preview] No.88495 del
>>88492
I think we're almost guaranteed some juicy chutes


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:50 [Preview] No.88496 del
>hyping up the break


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:50 [Preview] No.88497 del
I hope the break makes it, nothing brings me more joy seeing teams like FDJ sit there with 5 leadouts not able to sprint


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:51 [Preview] No.88498 del
Is Picnic PostNL in this race


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:51 [Preview] No.88499 del


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:52 [Preview] No.88500 del
organizers should do a tour de hongrie and declare the 5km mark also the finish line of the race


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:52 [Preview] No.88501 del
>>88496
I'm starting to believe


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:53 [Preview] No.88502 del
Ganna hasn't even been deployed yet. He can probably pull 20 seconds back by himself


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:53 [Preview] No.88503 del
quick step didn't waste their helpers until the very end.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:54 [Preview] No.88504 del
>neutralizes the stage
>still in the peleton
insulting kinda


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:54 [Preview] No.88505 del
Lol @ EF Education rider whiffing on multiple bidons


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:56 [Preview] No.88506 del
at some point the break will start playing around and lose 20 seconds
that dversnes dude can actually sprint a little so he'll be the first


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:56 [Preview] No.88507 del
>>88505
Imagine being a soigneur at the side of a road staring at a pedalton doing 65 km/h straight at you and your rider reaches out for a bottle


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:56 [Preview] No.88508 del
Gee?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:57 [Preview] No.88509 del
>>88506
He also looks like the stronger runner though


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:57 [Preview] No.88510 del
On secondary inspection, the cable looks fucked.
After 50k km, it's probably time for a replacement
I will bring it to the shop tomorrow, I already spent enough time on it as it is #JustPaypigThings


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:57 [Preview] No.88511 del
>>88508
based


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:57 [Preview] No.88512 del
gee-west pulling lol


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:58 [Preview] No.88513 del
>>88510
Just do it yourself, it's easy


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:58 [Preview] No.88514 del
>>88508
>gap starts growing immediately
lol


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:58 [Preview] No.88515 del
>>88510
>Having cables
>Calling oneself a paypig
Strange


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:58 [Preview] No.88516 del
JAYCO TO THE RESCUE


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:58 [Preview] No.88517 del
>>88510
>On secondary inspection, the cable looks fucked.
>After 50k km, it's probably time for a replacement
um, after 2 seasons you should replace your cables anyway.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:59 [Preview] No.88518 del
>>88506
at a certain point I think you want to be part of a winning break as much as you want the stage itself


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:59 [Preview] No.88519 del
>>88510
>50k km on one cable
wat


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 14:59 [Preview] No.88520 del
TSD
S
D


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:00 [Preview] No.88521 del
Wew, finally here to watch the finish of this flat stage. Let's see what has happened today!
>16 km neutralised the day after Jonas grabs pink
Death to Vismoids ASAP


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:00 [Preview] No.88522 del
I am here. Can't see SHIT on tiz


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:01 [Preview] No.88523 del
respect for Gee
>meanwhile fdj and picnig with 50 guys just wheelsucking


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:01 [Preview] No.88524 del
>>88522
still waiting for the flag of the Maltese Falcon to show up here


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:01 [Preview] No.88526 del
fuck off FDJ


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:02 [Preview] No.88527 del
>>88524
I am at the airport. Flight is of course delayed so hopefully tonight


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:02 [Preview] No.88528 del
It's ogre I think


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:02 [Preview] No.88529 del
(74.17 KB 740x798 303 v2.jpg)
By allah the """teams""" chasing the break will get KWAKED at the sprint


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:02 [Preview] No.88530 del
>>88525
Hey it works again. Thanks Bert


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:02 [Preview] No.88531 del
(42.79 KB 775x525 1625861698024.png)
>>88527
I thought you went there by car


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:02 [Preview] No.88532 del
Alpecin? For who???


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:03 [Preview] No.88533 del
>>88532
PLOWRIGHT


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:03 [Preview] No.88534 del
>>88532
the ghost of groves


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:03 [Preview] No.88535 del
>>88522
https://youtube.com/watch?v=CtJb8GuTwy0 [Embed]


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:03 [Preview] No.88536 del
>>88527
and you trust your car to blend in with the locals with your yellow numberplate while you leave it behind in Italy?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:04 [Preview] No.88537 del
>>88535
this post would get you banned on 4chan


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:04 [Preview] No.88538 del
(44.99 KB 217x197 1688745578492709.png)
>>88531
To Malta? Yes Bertacek, next time I will consider driving there


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:04 [Preview] No.88539 del
They've put the moto in front lmao


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:04 [Preview] No.88540 del
(1.20 MB 1280x720 videoframe_7471868.png)
do you believe in miracles?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:04 [Preview] No.88541 del
hahahahahaha YES


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:05 [Preview] No.88542 del
kwabbed,
TOTAL
SPRINTER
DEATH


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:05 [Preview] No.88543 del
>>88536
Well I paid 80 eurodollars to have it stay at some supposedly safe parking lot


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:05 [Preview] No.88544 del
Moto wins again, how surprising


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:06 [Preview] No.88545 del
KWAB

DNSfest next tuesday


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:06 [Preview] No.88546 del
well well well, look who joked about it earlier today: >>88391


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:07 [Preview] No.88547 del
That looked like a dangerous celebration


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:07 [Preview] No.88548 del
(36.82 KB 651x500 1627685523472.jpg)
Good
TSD


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:07 [Preview] No.88549 del
(1.90 MB 1280x720 videoframe_7619306.png)
norway no gay


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:07 [Preview] No.88550 del
I was told to take Dversnes off my team...


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:07 [Preview] No.88551 del
>>88538
I missed that episode, I thought you were stuck in some italian tunnel still


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:08 [Preview] No.88552 del
Italians kwabbed


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:08 [Preview] No.88553 del
drink faxe kondi


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:09 [Preview] No.88554 del
I picked this guy in multiple velogames and never was I rewarded once


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:09 [Preview] No.88555 del
huge for points jersey, too, swung way towards Narvaez with this


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:09 [Preview] No.88556 del
Love a good breakaway win


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:09 [Preview] No.88557 del
(181.49 KB 1209x847 faxe.jpg)
>>88553
It's pretty good.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:10 [Preview] No.88558 del
Best possible ending for such a stage


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:10 [Preview] No.88559 del
>>88554
Nobody is allowed to complain unless you have 4 DNF


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:10 [Preview] No.88560 del
>>88554
Such is life, at least Bais scored a lot of points, too


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:10 [Preview] No.88561 del
>>88559
well he's not on my team right now is he


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:10 [Preview] No.88562 del
>>88555
this one is worth 50 points according to the roadbook


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:11 [Preview] No.88563 del
When you can level a frame using the race profile, the sprinters have no one to blame but themselves


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:11 [Preview] No.88564 del
Excuse me, where is Milan?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:11 [Preview] No.88565 del
random Mielke in the back and Milan not giving a shit


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:11 [Preview] No.88566 del
>>88564
didn't even sprint


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:12 [Preview] No.88567 del
>>88564
14th, great. Behind Lonardi and Froidevaux


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:12 [Preview] No.88568 del
>>88562
>fatty filter 10km away from the finish
BASED


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:12 [Preview] No.88569 del
>>88564
>>88564
What do you mean? The race finished in Milan, it's right there


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:12 [Preview] No.88570 del
>>88564
in Milan


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:13 [Preview] No.88571 del
God bless the boys of the breakaway for salvaging what should have been an absolute slurper


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:13 [Preview] No.88572 del


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:14 [Preview] No.88573 del
>>88571
and god bless the motobikes


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:14 [Preview] No.88574 del
Is the barodeur the most kino rider style?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:16 [Preview] No.88575 del
he nearly pulled a vidrel


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:16 [Preview] No.88576 del
Polti having two riders saved the break from Shenanigans at the end.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:17 [Preview] No.88577 del
>51.391 km/h
milan bros, we were promised 35km/h


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:18 [Preview] No.88578 del
>>88575
Hehehe. Good thing the VAR was there so the winner could be decided


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:19 [Preview] No.88579 del
sprinters kwabbed in Grand Prix Criquielion also
TOTAL
SPRINTER
DEATH


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:23 [Preview] No.88580 del
(88.51 KB 498x416 1565818620021.gif)
Dad got collected. Sucks.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:26 [Preview] No.88581 del
>>88573
Walscheid whinging like mad about motos lol. Didn't look bad to me on the laps - moto in front of the pedalton as well anyway - was it bad on the rest of the stage?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:26 [Preview] No.88582 del
>>88580
happens to the best of us (not me). which reminds me, I saw a 70 year old on the latest s-works tarmac the other day.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:28 [Preview] No.88583 del
>>88580
F , is he alright


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:29 [Preview] No.88584 del
>>88580
Collected as in deceased? Or just his collarbone?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:31 [Preview] No.88585 del
>>88581
TTT also
his argument was: we went so fucking fast at the end, it's impossible for 4 guys to stay ahead without help


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:33 [Preview] No.88586 del
(10.31 KB 220x211 zajarany04.jpg)
KEK, only now I'm seeing the thread photo.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:34 [Preview] No.88587 del
>>88582
I think you should probably buy your final bike in your 60s. Buying a new bike in your 70s feels like hubris or something.
>>88583
>>88584
Collarbone krak. Needed surgery but should be okay from there eventually. Hoping for Herentals results.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:35 [Preview] No.88588 del
>>88585
both groups clearly had massive motopacing
that's just circuits with the gorillion motos they have in races these days


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:35 [Preview] No.88589 del
(49.58 KB 650x520 ok01.png)
>>88587
You'll just run a few errands for him and he will be fine in a month.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:39 [Preview] No.88590 del
>>88587
was he wearing a helmet? my parents still refuse to wear one and I've told them a million times and they just won't listen


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:44 [Preview] No.88591 del
>>88590
Yeah, not an issue here fortunately. Sucks when you have to raise your parents (or accept they're putting themselves at risk).


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:46 [Preview] No.88592 del
>>88589
Hello. I was just in MONTECASSINO and every sign was in Polish (and Italian of course). What the hell is up with that


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:52 [Preview] No.88593 del
>>88591
Had this with a grandparent and seat belts. "Oh I'll just hold it so it looks like I'm wearing it if we see a cop". No man, that's not why we wear it!


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:57 [Preview] No.88594 del
>>88593
der boomer


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 15:58 [Preview] No.88595 del
>>88592
WW2 battle when stupid Pol-acks again took the brunt of a suicidal attack on the monastery, eventually taking it.
There's a pretty scenic cemetery as well, guess now we have signs in Polish.
Heroism good and all, let them rest in peace, but there are too many Monte Cassino, Arnhem, Somosierra, too few Vienna, Grunwald, Chocim.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:01 [Preview] No.88596 del
(835.54 KB 2210x1662 ТРИ ПОЛОСКИ.jpg)
>Teriyaki-Honey


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:01 [Preview] No.88597 del
Come on, Bert, watch the last day of Natsu Basho with us!
30 mins.
https://cytu.be/r/endcorner


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:02 [Preview] No.88598 del
I ran out of "new" ideas rather quickly
And I don't know why the colours are fucked up


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:02 [Preview] No.88599 del
>>88596
I had this exact dish yesterday


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:03 [Preview] No.88600 del
>>88598
add Remco to islamic studies


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:05 [Preview] No.88601 del
>>88599
heh, just Bert things
very good stuff


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:07 [Preview] No.88602 del
I don't like salmon. Unless it's wild it's way too fat


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:09 [Preview] No.88603 del
>>88602
more for me I guess


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:11 [Preview] No.88604 del
I've been eating canned fish a lot recently. Honestly they're pretty good for 0 efforts it's perfect


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:11 [Preview] No.88605 del
>>88602
Doing one right now on my new pigged air fryer with grill.
Liked it more in the past, now I just buy it because it is too cheap when on sale, that also makes my tinfoil tingle about what the jew has fed it.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:13 [Preview] No.88606 del
(10.55 KB 248x268 BAIS.png)
BAISED


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:13 [Preview] No.88607 del
>>88598
>no diesel engine specialist


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:14 [Preview] No.88608 del
It was by popular (Bertine) request.
I like it too, but next time it will be roast beef burritos.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:14 [Preview] No.88609 del


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:17 [Preview] No.88610 del
(248.55 KB 1200x806 hmm mmh.png)
>>88605
>air fryer with grill
wait, air fryers are air assisted grills, no?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:21 [Preview] No.88611 del
>>88610
No it's more of a convection oven on steroids

Grills use direct heat on a grate

Which is different than barbecue


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:28 [Preview] No.88612 del
>>88610
>>88611
What Bert says, airfryer is just fancy word for a plain old oven but small, which you can also put on the countertop.
You can have extras like a grill or even space for pellet thus kinda bbqing.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 16:54 [Preview] No.88613 del
love my air fryer, for simple food it's just so fast and good
probably doesn't help my normal oven is ass


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:01 [Preview] No.88616 del
(455.67 KB 555x677 Capture.PNG)
jesus


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:24 [Preview] No.88617 del
>>88616
>DSQ
r a r e


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:41 [Preview] No.88618 del
>>88617
headbutting a guy off his bike mid sprint speed should probably be a 6 month ban or something


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:44 [Preview] No.88619 del
>>88616
>...is excluded from the Giro for having given a blow to the head of Donaldson during the sprint. The Brit is entombed in his suite. The
He killed him?!?


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:46 [Preview] No.88620 del
(14.93 KB 320x320 smiech01.jpg)
>>88619
Beautiful misheard lyrics.


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:51 [Preview] No.88621 del
>>88618
Heh, when Renshaw got DSQ for headbutting a guy in the 2010 Tour, he was back racing three weeks later. Although that didn't cause any crash


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:53 [Preview] No.88622 del
(3.10 MB 4000x3000 20260524_145231.jpg)
Hmm


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:53 [Preview] No.88623 del
>>88622
GOD BLESS THE USA


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 18:57 [Preview] No.88624 del
>>88621
Thought about this asshole immediately as well heh.
>>88622
Duuuude..


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:04 [Preview] No.88625 del
>>88622
assgreen..


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:18 [Preview] No.88626 del
>>88616
just saw a clip of that, metal as fuck


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:20 [Preview] No.88627 del
>>88626
I wanted to post it but I can't capture sporza with obs for some reason


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:26 [Preview] No.88629 del
(4.55 MB 608x1080 Ww0HQQ5s-mPYOEgA.mp4)


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:31 [Preview] No.88630 del
>Tim Torn Teutenberg fuming on Eurosport: >"Everyone who understand cycling know that it was bit of a joke today. I don't know what was the mission of the organizers, they wanted to show how cars and morbikes influence the race. This was bullshit."
moto gate, all of lidl is fuming


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:34 [Preview] No.88631 del
>>88630
Is anyone SLAMMING the moto runners though


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:38 [Preview] No.88632 del
(129.92 KB 1280x720 HJGXxBmWkAI2zEj.jpg)
the gain from motopacing is enormous even if the moto is 10m ahead


Bert 05/24/2026 (Sun) 19:38 [Preview] No.88633 del
>>88632
bertacek, post the volta webm of the car pushing the rider if you would please



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